Wednesday, April 16, 2008

sejak perkenalan kita

come to think of it, i don't have any lesbian friends at all!

now that's how you jump into a blog post without a proper introduction of what you're about to talk about. as if you fucks give a fuck anyway.

yes. none at all. maybe my best fren edah of australian descent and has forgotten us malaysians has experimented before but she is totally straight now right edah?

i don't think i can recall ever having a lesbian friend. wow. wut a bummer.

i have gay friends. infact even back in school i had one gay friend. he was proudly gay, or pondan. the upside to chillin' with him is there's always chicks around him, cause he is practically a chick anyway.

the apex of his gayness was this dewd he had a crush on. the dewd had a good boy face, and kinda looked like that x-files dude.

and the worst part of this crush was gay dude begged me to send this x-files dewd a love letter he/she wrote. wow. it was fucked up. i didn't remember whether i really sent it or not, maybe i did at the canteen. but that was just fucked up. i was a postman for a potential gay relationship.

i'm pretty sure x-files dewd was straight though, although he was jambu, he had that good boy shit going on. but he was a senior so he was probably an arsehole anyway.

talk about seniors. i used to have a big crush on this one chick who was prolly the beautifulest in my class. but for some reason she has this asshole senior for a pet brotha. the dewd thinks he's the coolest dewd in school. he's ugly you know. and he looks like a nerd. but for some alternate fucking universe reason he's my crush's pet brotha.

my crush is fucking beautiful you know? of all my crushes in my memory she was prolly the most prettiest. fuck fuck daym.

man this is fucked up. and i hated that smug ass fuckface dewd. infact my homies in the class hated that dude az well (they obviously had a secret crush on my crush as well, my crush was secret too anyway).

so two of mah homies devised this masterful plan.

once the teachers were all in a meeting so all classes were free to do whateva. and naturafuckingly the arsehole dewd will be checking up on his pet sistah (what the fuck is all this pet brotha pet sista bullshit, fuck that shit, anything for a fucking lay, anything these fucking humans (i'm pissed)). so while she's deep in a conversation with him, muthafuckah what would they be conversating about, that arsehole dewd was probably the most boringest poser asshole anyone could know, with his not-cool oh-i-think-i'm-cool laugh and that fuck nerd geek face. fuck you.

anyway.

so two of mah homies pretended to chase each other.

and strategically one of them would end up behind the arsehole dewd.

and the other one who's supposedly chasing will maki (curse the fuck outta) the otha homie.

i don't remember exactly what was said.

but i would imagine it went like WEH KAU PANTAT KAU SIAL KAU PUKI KAU KAU MEMANG PUKI KAU SIAL KAU PANTEK KAU BLA BLA BLA (FUCK YOU YOU'RE A CUNT YOU FUCKING CUNT CUNT CUNT PRICK PIECE OF SHIT CUNT).

so it was a clever way to let go of all this fuck-youness out on the arsehole fuckface dewd, cause the otha homie was behind him right, so it's like a cover, but in reality the homie was cursing at arsehole fuckface dewd.

and then they both ran back to the corner of the class where we all chilled. and we all had a good and loud high pitched laugh about it. while arsehole is oblivious to everything.

yeah take that you fucking nerd geek pet brotha cunt!

that'lll teach ya not to try and steal our crush (secret)!

back to the topic at hand. oh yeah. i don't have lesbian friends. i wonder what it would be like to have a conversation with a lesbo. hmm. any lesbos interested to be mah frenz?

4 comments:

The Rhymeweaver said...

yo haq were u in boarding school back then? pet sistahz and brothaz sound a lot like boarding school shit.

Cheers
The Rhymeweaver

penyangak said...

yes but this was b4 dat. even normal schools have this shit. in boarding schools all the pet brotha sista shit was to help each other. in normal school, all the pet brotha sista shit was to get laid.

The Rhymeweaver said...

ye lah tu help each other lol. pet sistah n brothas tu sebenarnye couple2 gak tuh, but on a younger scale. poor buggers dont know how to get a girl yg sebaya dgn diorg so diorg amik adik angkat. abis citer

btw i linked you in my blog here, will appreciate it if you could link mine :)

Cheers
The Rhymeweaver

penyangak said...

for sho' bruv. linked.