Thursday, September 20, 2007

if i ever get to sweden tell the german chicks ill brb

IF I EVER GET I
You know your mind is missing movies when you start dreaming in screenplays. Remember that british movie love, actually where they follow different characters in different situations/places? Something like that was my dream a few days ago, it was bizarre, it was like I'm watching with my eyes only an inch from the screen - a stupid artsy fartsy movie that follows 50 characters every 20 minutes one-by-one back to that back to this back to that again bla bla bla. I'm not supposed to dream shit like this, I mean where the fuck did this come from?. Yes I've been abandoning movies for Entourage a month ago and then 70's show episodes watched in order recently. I also realized after watching 70's show systematically that I've watched nearly all of it in the past though not in the best order.

In another dream, throughout the whole thing I had The Clash - tommy gun playing in my mind. It's funny cause I don't listen to that song much and I don't even remember how it goes but somehow my subconciousness seems to remember every bit of it and pitched it to the music director of my dream who approved it as the score. Maybe my subconciousness is crying out to me telling me I've been abandoning it, like "doggy, you been slackingj oireaidxcnou jehla j n2 31ds cj;a.

You know you're old when you're watching 70's show and you're siding with Red all the time. I remember clearly a few years ago when I was watching Eric wanting to marry Donna, I was all go Eric go for the sake of love, but watching it now it's like yo Eric you a dumbass. How about when Donna was supposed to go for college and Eric in his heart wanted Donna to not get on the bus. Donna eventually out of her own will did not get on the bus. Back then it was like awwwww how lovey dovey, now it's like Donna you're a dumbass. Only now do I get to understand the parents, now you understand why young people are fucking idiots. Dumbasses. [red]Your ass is vacant and my foot is looking for a room[/red]

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IF I EVER GET II
This one is for this month's feel. Back in the days there was this Imam dude, he had a Neighbour. During his time you can't get caught drinking so Neighbour dude drank privately while singing drunkfully ohhh theyyy abandonn meee theyy abandonnn meee.. if only they knew what theyyy abandonnnnneddd (well something like this). I mean nobody should be able to hear him but Imam dude did as you know these were in those old ghetto housing estates where people lived close to each other.

Neighbour dude would sing each time he gets drunk, usually after work, and Imam dude would listen except one day when it was all silent.

Imam dude was curious so he went to the mosque (if I'm not mistaken) and asked about. Dudes around the mosque was like yo Imam dude, Neighbour dude got taken captive by the guards yo, he got caught drinking and shit.

Imam dude was like okay, he got on his mule and went straight to the Khalifah's palace. I mean during these times they had a million guards surrounding the palace which would be situated in the middle, but Imam dude was so powerful and respected they would let him ride straight through to the Khalifah. Fuck it's like me driving my car straight to Pak Lah's room, that's how much respect everybody had for Imam dude. I'm like damn, this Imam dude.. he's the shit! He ain't nuthin', just a modest dude with a lot of knowledge, he don't got no fancy position or connections, he's his own man, his own boss, but everybody respects him like a mufucka. Straight to the Khalifah homie, the Khalifah is his homie? You got connections? Well he got more connections.

Okay too much there back to the story .. so Imam dude was like yo Khalifah let go of my neighbour. The Khalifah was like yo, you got it Imam dude. Dapped it up. Imam dude picked up Neighbour dude on his mule. Neighbour dude was like wtf what's up?

Imam dude said something which goes something like "Yo, have I abandoned you?"

Neighbour dude was like, dayummmmmmmmmmmm. From that day on he stopped drinking, he's happy now. He a good muslim now, boi.

THE END

So you see I know it's a simple story but to me the most important thing is the gestures. Imam dude is a fucking IMAM, yet he is the opposite of the majority of muslims you know in this world. You would think an imam would tell a drunk that he's going to hell and should stop fucking drinking or his ass gettin' beat. Or simply just report him to the authorities. But fuck me, he got dude out of jail, and he didn't even say a word to dude about his drinkly habit. Level of judgmentaliting - 0, level of religious ass analness - 0, level of religious annoyance - 0, level of coolness - 100%. Who is this imam dude? well he is only one of the infamous four imams of Islam, his name Nu'man.

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