satu scene dekat maybank.
aku tengah pakai baju warna turqoise pekat yang ada gambar besar tangan yang secara coolnya dikelilingi oleh speakers sambil buat lambang peace dengan seluar sukan colourful 3/4 ecko unlimited yang beli kat factory outlet store and dah sangat out of fashion.
ada perems cina agaknya in her early to late 20s (padahal boleh je cakap in her 20s saje nak complicatedkan keadaan) tengok t-shirt aku lain macam. dalam otak aku cam HELLO hang tengok bawah sana buatpaa cute face kat atas nih tak nampak. cis penat aku pakai cream tiap-tiap hari takde respons langsung dari masyarakat umum.
anyway ini apa yang terjadi.
KRRINGGG KRINGGGG! (terus beberapa orang ingat phone derang bunyik pasal ramai handphone guna ringtone nih. aku assume je bende nih jadik sebab everytime bunyik camnih aku selalu ingat handphone aku yang bunyik. ha'ah pada masa lapang aku aku suka assume orang suka perasan handphone derang berbunyik cam aku)
gadis operator (go): ini encik pd ye?
pd: ye
go: saya kirsten johansson dari maybank financial services
pd: ok (dengan blur sepenuh jiwa)
go: boleh saya ambil masa encik sebentar?
pd: oh, jangan lupa pulang balik masa tuh sudah kirsten, may i call you kirsten? (actually aku cakap "ok" je)
tiba tiba ada suara latar di suasana: DUA! KOSONG! TUJUH! LAPAN!
(diucapkan oleh seorang perempuan yang boleh maintain nada sama sepanjang masa. fikir sendri pebende nih)
go: eh (aku assume at the other end of the line dia tengah tergamam), encik kat one utama ye? err maksud saya bank? (actually dia tak cakap pun one utama tuh dia tersilap cakap something else yang jauh lagi kelakar dari one utama tapi aku tak ingat)
pd: uhuh
go: err (dengan agak nervous macam aku tengah interview dia kerja) nanti saya call balik pada waktu lain ye
*tup letak telefon*
sampai hari nih dah tak call balik dah.
ada tiga kemungkinan sebab bende nih jadi:
satu, ini semua mimpi atau imaginasi aku yang ligat persis lalat tatkala ketemuan taik segar masa tengah tunggu bende kat bank setel.
dua, minah nih kawan aku yang nak buat prank call tapi terpaksa cancel lepas dengar bunyik nombor giliran dipanggil sebab dia ada pengalaman kurang manis dengan sistem nombor giliran samada di bank atau pejabat pos yang menyebabkan dirinya membina fobia terhadap sistem itu sehingga suara wanita yang direcord atas tujuan dimainkan oleh mesin nombor giliran pun boleh mengakibatkan dia peluh sejuk.
tiga, minah nih sebenarnya nak buat fraud call and bila dia budget aku dekat bank dia cuak ah. kang aku tanya bebudak bank nih betul ke apa minah nih cakap ah susah kang. baik dia letak.
...
kalau korang tak setuju dengan tiga hipotesis di atas. amik borang bantahan kat jabatan pendaftaran negara, isik, lepas tuh tampal kat muka sendiri guna double sided tape and jalan-jalan keliling town sampai puas hati. thanks.
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Saturday, October 17, 2009
you and me driven all around cape town
tadi kat shopping complex ada dua parti yang patut bertemu untuk makan buffet. parti aku dah sampai terlalu awal so kitorang terpaksa berlegar-legar. aku meronda sensorang lah since request aku untuk mereka bawak aku ke la senza di tolak dengan beberapa senyuman ala wtf and kaki mereka slow-slow bergerak kiri kanan ke arah yang bertentangan dari la senza yang ada diskaun beli dua dapat satu. tak baik mintak perkara-perkara sebegini kat adik-adik perems anda sendiri, mintak satu dapat kosong.
aku gi tingkat atas yang ada wayang tengok kot-kot ada tunjuk cerita inglorious basterds ke kat wayang leh layan and biarkan dua parti tuh bingung kenapa mamat yang akan makan berpinggan-pinggan seraya memperberbaloikan membuffet kat buffet hilang. tapi takde kot, sebab time tuh jugak mamat badan tough bercermin mata hitam yang berkerja untuk iklan anti piracy tuh morph dari form cutboard ke realiti and cakap 'tak dapat jack lu tunggu download sudah'. aku cam 'bukan kau keje untuk anti piracy nye ad?', pastuh dia buat muka-muka nervous mata berkelip pastuh cam tetiba clear throat and buat suara lain deep sikit sambil pandang kiri kanan cam 'uhuh yes yes! no say no to piracy! no!' pastuh malu-malu tukar balik ke form cardboard dia.
aku jalan-jalan lagi lalu-lalu part ada tempat bowling. mmm ada banyak meja pool. teringat kat betapa hustla nye aku main pool and asik menang dengan seseorang yang menawan ini huhuhuhu EEEZY. pastuh kan aku jalan balik ke arah eskalator tapi singgah kedai majalah tuh untuk beli cincau.
bukan aku nak cakap memang aku gi situ aku dah tau nak beli cincau aku just tau aku nak beli air and *ting* i choose you cincau!
and then aku bukak air tin cincau tuh dengan penuh macho guna satu tangan cam aku depa kan tangan aku and dengan commando nya bukak. tapi takde sorang pun notice :/
aku turun eskalator sambil minum cincau nih. mmm.
eskalator nih panjang gila kot sebab dia tak silap aku selang satu floor.
best.
bila aku sampai bawah aku sedar, agak layan ye minum cincau sambil turun eskalator.
aku goncang sikit tin cincau sambil tengok dalam lubang tuh.
hmm ada lagi sikit.
aku naik balik eskalator. and aku turun lagi sambil minum cincau.
layan.
later on lepas buffet aku balik rumah to be on standby so that malam tuh aku akan ada depan pc untuk update blog dengan entry yang buat orang baca rasa cam apa point mamat nih.
aku gi tingkat atas yang ada wayang tengok kot-kot ada tunjuk cerita inglorious basterds ke kat wayang leh layan and biarkan dua parti tuh bingung kenapa mamat yang akan makan berpinggan-pinggan seraya memperberbaloikan membuffet kat buffet hilang. tapi takde kot, sebab time tuh jugak mamat badan tough bercermin mata hitam yang berkerja untuk iklan anti piracy tuh morph dari form cutboard ke realiti and cakap 'tak dapat jack lu tunggu download sudah'. aku cam 'bukan kau keje untuk anti piracy nye ad?', pastuh dia buat muka-muka nervous mata berkelip pastuh cam tetiba clear throat and buat suara lain deep sikit sambil pandang kiri kanan cam 'uhuh yes yes! no say no to piracy! no!' pastuh malu-malu tukar balik ke form cardboard dia.
aku jalan-jalan lagi lalu-lalu part ada tempat bowling. mmm ada banyak meja pool. teringat kat betapa hustla nye aku main pool and asik menang dengan seseorang yang menawan ini huhuhuhu EEEZY. pastuh kan aku jalan balik ke arah eskalator tapi singgah kedai majalah tuh untuk beli cincau.
bukan aku nak cakap memang aku gi situ aku dah tau nak beli cincau aku just tau aku nak beli air and *ting* i choose you cincau!
and then aku bukak air tin cincau tuh dengan penuh macho guna satu tangan cam aku depa kan tangan aku and dengan commando nya bukak. tapi takde sorang pun notice :/
aku turun eskalator sambil minum cincau nih. mmm.
eskalator nih panjang gila kot sebab dia tak silap aku selang satu floor.
best.
bila aku sampai bawah aku sedar, agak layan ye minum cincau sambil turun eskalator.
aku goncang sikit tin cincau sambil tengok dalam lubang tuh.
hmm ada lagi sikit.
aku naik balik eskalator. and aku turun lagi sambil minum cincau.
layan.
later on lepas buffet aku balik rumah to be on standby so that malam tuh aku akan ada depan pc untuk update blog dengan entry yang buat orang baca rasa cam apa point mamat nih.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
sempurna sempurna
do i miss living alone in my attic which i moved to from my former lair the pink cave. do i miss being manipulated into buying provisions for very normal looking alley cats who practice the fine arts of japanese self-defense and spend all afternoon macking on whitish catty femmes. maybe yes maybe no maybe between yes and no. maybe between two maybes, which would basically be just another maybe in which case this sentence just wasted your time not that it was not already wasted reading this awfully time-wasting waster of a blog.
i do recall having a certain morning infatuation with a certain mee hoon ganja. why ganja? cause it feels good to submit to its essence but at the same time i'm not exactly addicted to it. what do i know about submitting to a form of essence? i think i do, a bit, now, at least. what do i know about addiction? oh i'm pretty sure i do, now, addicted to a certain shade of color.
i quite recall being under attack this evening by a swarm of source of light-obsessed sky-bound thinsects. no, i still haven't figured out the english name for these creatures. as declared on my ever ignored twitter presence, i summoned my army of micro macrosses. ahhh macross, mmm childhood.
do i not think in random directions anymore, probably. is this a blessing, probably. probably the result of not inhibiting somewhere with purple skies, manipulative felines, and narcotically-enhanced food. probably the result of shedding more than one third of my former gravity-bound inclinator count. don't google that term i just spewed from my ever spewing jungle of exist as none and none so ever existing trees. i am beyond saving, in other words, i am beyond googling. google my knowledge and you will get a planet dedicated to habitating factories engineering clone troopers constituted from heredity strands of existening-inexistence in existence. i am clouds that appear not from risen air but from a, well, just, to, put, it, simply... appearance.
i am being chased and even though i am the hunted i do not think of myself as a victim. i hope you won't think of yourself as one too, despite all the wearying hunting. i do not even agree with that depicted as the dynamics of this. perhaps we'll take turns with the fur hat. we'll take breathers and after each time we'll come back with hearts full of collective yearn. if we can't lick the skies each day surf the cosmos each night, let's just be boring together.
most of what i've written here were conceived during the full five minutes of me walking up and down the stairs stopping halfway at the bottom to drink a glass of milk.
it definitely took more than five minutes to type-in. think about it.
there's really nothing to think about. thinking is overrated. let's do underrated things and get back to overrated at our conveniences. let's always be convenient. so we won't have to be too hollywood. it's tiring to think of a soundtrack when we could just hum together melodies that will surround our ever expanding possibility.
i do recall having a certain morning infatuation with a certain mee hoon ganja. why ganja? cause it feels good to submit to its essence but at the same time i'm not exactly addicted to it. what do i know about submitting to a form of essence? i think i do, a bit, now, at least. what do i know about addiction? oh i'm pretty sure i do, now, addicted to a certain shade of color.
i quite recall being under attack this evening by a swarm of source of light-obsessed sky-bound thinsects. no, i still haven't figured out the english name for these creatures. as declared on my ever ignored twitter presence, i summoned my army of micro macrosses. ahhh macross, mmm childhood.
do i not think in random directions anymore, probably. is this a blessing, probably. probably the result of not inhibiting somewhere with purple skies, manipulative felines, and narcotically-enhanced food. probably the result of shedding more than one third of my former gravity-bound inclinator count. don't google that term i just spewed from my ever spewing jungle of exist as none and none so ever existing trees. i am beyond saving, in other words, i am beyond googling. google my knowledge and you will get a planet dedicated to habitating factories engineering clone troopers constituted from heredity strands of existening-inexistence in existence. i am clouds that appear not from risen air but from a, well, just, to, put, it, simply... appearance.
i am being chased and even though i am the hunted i do not think of myself as a victim. i hope you won't think of yourself as one too, despite all the wearying hunting. i do not even agree with that depicted as the dynamics of this. perhaps we'll take turns with the fur hat. we'll take breathers and after each time we'll come back with hearts full of collective yearn. if we can't lick the skies each day surf the cosmos each night, let's just be boring together.
most of what i've written here were conceived during the full five minutes of me walking up and down the stairs stopping halfway at the bottom to drink a glass of milk.
it definitely took more than five minutes to type-in. think about it.
there's really nothing to think about. thinking is overrated. let's do underrated things and get back to overrated at our conveniences. let's always be convenient. so we won't have to be too hollywood. it's tiring to think of a soundtrack when we could just hum together melodies that will surround our ever expanding possibility.
Sunday, October 04, 2009
tunggu aku di petaling jaya
aku memang suka open house sebab usually hidangan makanan dia dalam bentuk buffet.
so aku dengan sesukanya leh amik semua kesukaan aku dalam sukatan yang aku suka. suka hati ah.
paling best kalau open house tuh selang serumah je so aku leh makan and gerak tanpa kacau tuan rumah or tunggu untuk balik serentak dengan sesapa yang datang dengan aku. tak nak lah kacau tuan rumah, dah lah aku tah sesapa dalam hidup dia dah tentu dia patut lagi busy melayan orang-orang lagi meaningful bagi dia contohnya mereka mereka yang datang dengan aku yang tak patut aku ajak balik awal sebab dah tentu nak dilayan oleh tuan rumah yang menganggap beliau-beliau meaningful.
maka boleh lah aku amik 15-20 minutes untuk makan and then tross jalan 20 langkah balik untuk melayan si dia yang menawan dan lagi meaningful bagi aku.
tadi aku amik nasi tomato sikit pastuh tiga ketul ayam merah, dua roti jala yang cicah dengan kuah ayam merah (ayam merah nih fav wa kot), satay ayam + daging dalam 10 or so keping, dua gelas sirap yang tak manis (just the way ai laik it), and beberapa kutilan kuih.
aku tak kesah nak duk mana or nak kena duduk dekat dengan sapa aku just sebat join meja kat belakang tuh. aku nampak sorang pilot nih dan rakan-rakan tanya ah 'bang ada orang?' 'eh tak sila sila' dengan muka baik ala-ala ramah tapi takde ah ramah sampai nak tanya aku keje apa (just the way ai laik it) mereka. aku tunduk and tak tengok keliling, aku terus melahap secara bedosup haaa.
pastuh aku terfikir, camana aku tahu mamat sebelah aku nih pilot? oh yeah sebab dia pakai uniform pilot.
..
waitsa minute or two!? asal lak dia nak pakai uniform pilot gi open house?
ini show off tahap sampai bawah hidung apa pride sangat dengan profession sendiri sampai gi open house kena eveready steady go pakai uniform. ke dia baru balik keje? macam tak sempat nak tukar baju. takpun dia datang sini naik jet, takpun ufo, aku tak rasa jet senang nak landing area berbukit bukau ala padi huma nih, ufo mungkin sebab ufo dia landing straight ke bawah gitu. teknologi derang light years ahead sket bro.
masa nih lah aku decide untuk just jeling sikit. ler rupanya pak guard. hehe. pak guard nih lah antara yang selalu aku senyum manja dekat. tak tahu dia cam aku tak, segan adik nak tegur, hihihihi (gelak manja ala-ala lisa surihani uols). takpe ah aku pun dengan segan seluruh badan recommence dengan pemakanan. of course mula-mula je memalu ala daun semalu lepas tuh since it's ayam merah we be talkin' bout here homeslice wa tars je. teringat masa kat utm dulu kat macam kedai kecik nih hari jumaat mesti serve nasi tomato. pastuh nih masa first year aku akan gi tingkat atas kat masjid dengan kengkawan pastuh tidur and kengkawan aku gelakkan aku pasal aku nye badan kan lebar lagi tebal gitu bila tidur mengiring kepala susah nak jejak lantai haha.
anyway. memang satu meja tuh pak guard kot. wa rasa cool kejap ah, lepak meja belakang, kat depan semua senyum senyum ramah mesra elit sambil aku lepak dengan bebudak cool yang muka lek lu sak kok lu lek je makan takde control pastuh datang lak abang sawo matang bermisai dengan daging-daging penuh satu pinggan sambil dia announce 'REINFORCEMENTS!' wa tak buih, jack. tapi diaorang nih cakap accent satu pesen, macam accent sabah campur kelantan. wa rasa cool lagi, lepak dengan brader brader yang ada accent exotic gitu. sambil wa padahal senyap je satu corner makan sambil monologue dalam kepala secara accent chicano gitu, orale carnal, huacha.
sedap je assume accent diaorang sabah campur kelantan kan.
apa lah aku tahu, aku cuma si gedik yang dilanda rindu.
so aku dengan sesukanya leh amik semua kesukaan aku dalam sukatan yang aku suka. suka hati ah.
paling best kalau open house tuh selang serumah je so aku leh makan and gerak tanpa kacau tuan rumah or tunggu untuk balik serentak dengan sesapa yang datang dengan aku. tak nak lah kacau tuan rumah, dah lah aku tah sesapa dalam hidup dia dah tentu dia patut lagi busy melayan orang-orang lagi meaningful bagi dia contohnya mereka mereka yang datang dengan aku yang tak patut aku ajak balik awal sebab dah tentu nak dilayan oleh tuan rumah yang menganggap beliau-beliau meaningful.
maka boleh lah aku amik 15-20 minutes untuk makan and then tross jalan 20 langkah balik untuk melayan si dia yang menawan dan lagi meaningful bagi aku.
tadi aku amik nasi tomato sikit pastuh tiga ketul ayam merah, dua roti jala yang cicah dengan kuah ayam merah (ayam merah nih fav wa kot), satay ayam + daging dalam 10 or so keping, dua gelas sirap yang tak manis (just the way ai laik it), and beberapa kutilan kuih.
aku tak kesah nak duk mana or nak kena duduk dekat dengan sapa aku just sebat join meja kat belakang tuh. aku nampak sorang pilot nih dan rakan-rakan tanya ah 'bang ada orang?' 'eh tak sila sila' dengan muka baik ala-ala ramah tapi takde ah ramah sampai nak tanya aku keje apa (just the way ai laik it) mereka. aku tunduk and tak tengok keliling, aku terus melahap secara bedosup haaa.
pastuh aku terfikir, camana aku tahu mamat sebelah aku nih pilot? oh yeah sebab dia pakai uniform pilot.
..
waitsa minute or two!? asal lak dia nak pakai uniform pilot gi open house?
ini show off tahap sampai bawah hidung apa pride sangat dengan profession sendiri sampai gi open house kena eveready steady go pakai uniform. ke dia baru balik keje? macam tak sempat nak tukar baju. takpun dia datang sini naik jet, takpun ufo, aku tak rasa jet senang nak landing area berbukit bukau ala padi huma nih, ufo mungkin sebab ufo dia landing straight ke bawah gitu. teknologi derang light years ahead sket bro.
masa nih lah aku decide untuk just jeling sikit. ler rupanya pak guard. hehe. pak guard nih lah antara yang selalu aku senyum manja dekat. tak tahu dia cam aku tak, segan adik nak tegur, hihihihi (gelak manja ala-ala lisa surihani uols). takpe ah aku pun dengan segan seluruh badan recommence dengan pemakanan. of course mula-mula je memalu ala daun semalu lepas tuh since it's ayam merah we be talkin' bout here homeslice wa tars je. teringat masa kat utm dulu kat macam kedai kecik nih hari jumaat mesti serve nasi tomato. pastuh nih masa first year aku akan gi tingkat atas kat masjid dengan kengkawan pastuh tidur and kengkawan aku gelakkan aku pasal aku nye badan kan lebar lagi tebal gitu bila tidur mengiring kepala susah nak jejak lantai haha.
anyway. memang satu meja tuh pak guard kot. wa rasa cool kejap ah, lepak meja belakang, kat depan semua senyum senyum ramah mesra elit sambil aku lepak dengan bebudak cool yang muka lek lu sak kok lu lek je makan takde control pastuh datang lak abang sawo matang bermisai dengan daging-daging penuh satu pinggan sambil dia announce 'REINFORCEMENTS!' wa tak buih, jack. tapi diaorang nih cakap accent satu pesen, macam accent sabah campur kelantan. wa rasa cool lagi, lepak dengan brader brader yang ada accent exotic gitu. sambil wa padahal senyap je satu corner makan sambil monologue dalam kepala secara accent chicano gitu, orale carnal, huacha.
sedap je assume accent diaorang sabah campur kelantan kan.
apa lah aku tahu, aku cuma si gedik yang dilanda rindu.
Friday, October 02, 2009
pelan tapi pasti
you just can't drive through the penchala link tunnel with guitar wolf's jet generation blaring on your speakers.
this song is from a band that brought jamming studio (non)ethics into a recording studio and onto a record. every single distortion every single feedback every instance of fingers and picks arrogating the strings have seized a path into material equipments forcing a full frontal sonic assault into the captivity of recordance.
this is loudness personified, how fitting that loudness is also the name of another legendary japanese band. this is punk rock that stands out amongst other punk rock by simply outlouding the rest.
the point is, when guitar wolf is assaulting and bashing my eardrums, pounding on their respective instruments, screaming awesomely badass and badassedly awesome catchphrases like "LOCK N LOL LICENCSE!" and "JETTU GENERATION!" i can't help but hallucinate that i am speeding away from 100km/hly running zombies.
i can't help but feel the urge to just glide onto the tunnel walls ala men in black and start to half-pipingly drive upside down or leftside right or rightside left say what. ahhh good thing musically-induced narcotics are something you can constantly snap out of... cause i haven't repaired my car's gravity-defier switch yet.
a few contractors were putting up some large paintings on the walls in the staircases. i wonder why when i suggested we put large paintings of naked ladies instead my mom just laughed it off as if my wide-eyed request was understandably ridiculous. mmm, it's probably cause she understands the concepts of decency and morality.
this song is from a band that brought jamming studio (non)ethics into a recording studio and onto a record. every single distortion every single feedback every instance of fingers and picks arrogating the strings have seized a path into material equipments forcing a full frontal sonic assault into the captivity of recordance.
this is loudness personified, how fitting that loudness is also the name of another legendary japanese band. this is punk rock that stands out amongst other punk rock by simply outlouding the rest.
the point is, when guitar wolf is assaulting and bashing my eardrums, pounding on their respective instruments, screaming awesomely badass and badassedly awesome catchphrases like "LOCK N LOL LICENCSE!" and "JETTU GENERATION!" i can't help but hallucinate that i am speeding away from 100km/hly running zombies.
i can't help but feel the urge to just glide onto the tunnel walls ala men in black and start to half-pipingly drive upside down or leftside right or rightside left say what. ahhh good thing musically-induced narcotics are something you can constantly snap out of... cause i haven't repaired my car's gravity-defier switch yet.
a few contractors were putting up some large paintings on the walls in the staircases. i wonder why when i suggested we put large paintings of naked ladies instead my mom just laughed it off as if my wide-eyed request was understandably ridiculous. mmm, it's probably cause she understands the concepts of decency and morality.
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