some shit i've watched

Teachers
a UK channel four tv series. not so bad. it's no Peep Show (well to be fair it came before peep show) but ya know, it's not bad. i hate those clever gimmicky things they always do like you know manicky imaginary shit going which is sooo 2001, and this show was from 2001 anyway so anyway who cares, it wasn't bad, i enjoyed some of the humour and characters.

Central Do Brasil (Central Station)
a classic brazilian film about a (mild) conwoman, and a street-ridden kid. it was okay, you know, i guess when it comes to brazilian films, my heart belongs to the favelas (cidade de deus, tropa de elite, cidade dos homens, etc), which might explain why i didn't enjoy this one, and pixote (which is a classic) as much as those three mentioned. there's just something about squatters on mountains next to the ocean so appealing on a level that i can't decide on because i started with there's just something which meant i don't really have a grasp on what the fuck i am trying to explain right now. krugh. lalz.

In Bruges
nice irish comedy/gangster shit. atmosphere might seem a little dark, the comedy definitely on an 'inappropriate' level, like a lotta light-hearted what the fuck situations, like, what the fuck penyangak? i don't even know what i'm saying but i thought it was funny like what the fuck haha, nice one. it's about two irish assassins sent to bruges to stay low for a while, who? what? why? watch. and it must be a trademark for most british gangster/crime flicks to have beautiful colour corrections.

La Mujer De Mi Hermano
a mexican film about beautiful rich fuck houses and a beautiful confused wife. i need to stress 'beautiful confused wife'. i need to re-stress 'BEAUTIFUL confused wife. cause she's fine as fuck. it's about a beautiful ass fucking gloriously gorgeous hot cute fuck beautiful divine ass fucking good looking married chick who's confused. if only it was i who just happened to be at the right place right time in the midst of her confusion. argkh. other than that, nothing much to shout about other than the great colours, filmography, and the title's similarity to mis 3 hermanas. mm mis 3 hermanas, mm ROXANA DIAZ.

mm ROXANA DIAZ. (i'll post pics of the chick from the movie which is more appropriate later cos i gotta run off to work in a while, yeah i wrote this right after finishing the whole entry and realizing i need more pics up in this bitch, latah).



Sunshine
i normally think sci-fis are corny, but this wasn't bad. ehh it was aight.

Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay
it was aight. quite funny. prefer the first one.

Secuestro Express
pretty good venezuelan movie (why am i watching a lotta south american flicks? causa the hot chicks of course why else you clueless cunt) about abduction of rich fucks by fucky fucks from ghettos which is something normal in poor south america. interesting. i think mosta the thugs were played by rappers, one of them wore the same shoes as this one shoe i have. and no i have never abducted anyone. no i don't have a gun. and yes the similarity starts and ends with the shoes. one of the most fucked up scene was when one of the thugs accompanied one of the abductees to the atm and the abductee got abducted by another criminal and a really ironic situation ensued. and it's pretty fucked up that the american english dictionary spell check is red-lining abductee which exists in british ones, well fuck you bush.

The Prestige
quite nice film about magicians, and magic, and shit. and both of me was in it. penyangak bale AND penyangak jackman.

Wild Zero
BADASS. LOCK N LOLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




did i say badass?
(of course you already did you cliched fat fuck)

some things i learnt from this movie:

• always comb your hair after doing something like shooting zombies or while your band leader is shooting zombies or killing them with magic guitar picks or whatevah.


• always carry a guitar on your back while helping out a fellow rock n roller fend away zombies. and on that note, always carry a katana in your guitar but use it only once per movie.


• whenever you're in a high-storey building and the bad guy shoots a missile towards the exact room you're in, always jump through the window from the explosion while shouting LOCK N LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!


• more cool shit.


• muthafuckah.

If...
classic 60's british movie which sparked the rise of the psycho badassery that is malcolm mcdowell and some even say, punk! the gist of the film is the conclusion of it so i can't say much other than that it's about a british boarding school, crazy ass malcolm mcdowell. some of his pawns. and some random chick they found in a cafe (or a dream?).

Sepi
some malay movie from that dude who did cinta? cinta wasn't bad. this one was like, okay if you feel like watching a 2-hour long music video of a sappy ass malay love song, you can gladly watch this. other than that, nothing else except maybe a bit of afdlin shauki humour, fapping to oldies like nasha aziz and vanida imran (mmm vanida imran in baju kurung mm fap fap fap), and some other shit. btw, i watched this in the cinema. come on laugh at me now, i will not take it personally or grab my axe. oh and i remembered that ve dude destroying ikhlas tapi jauh for some ost, now he's doing it to that rossa aku bukan untukmu song (which was beautifully sung by her). wow, notorious. what i meant was, WHEN THE FUCK WILL THIS ASSFUCKERY END!?!! ARGKH.

Hellboy II: The Golden Army
it was aight. just like the first one. nice designs. not much of a darky gothicy fairy taily kinda guy but i can appreciate the designs still. nahmeen.

Anwar vs. Shabery Debate (about lowering fuel prices)
LOL aka LALZ aka wauhkgehagheaukhukga. a nice widely hyped and televised guide to the umno way of responding to the opposition's oppositioning. rule number one, never address any type of enquiries directly cause if you try to you will look like a shit cause everybody knows those enquiries refer to the obvious fuck ups of the party that owns you. rule number two, always refer to irrelevant personal or ridiculously sensationalized issues. rule number three, try your best to look like a benign cyst compared to the opposition representative. rule number four, make sure next morning the mainstream newspapers project clearly that you were the opposite of the benign cyst that you actually were, exaggeration of a non-existent success in fending off opposition attack is a bonus. and other cunty rules, of course.

fuck you.

omar little (from the wire) vs. some government pawn (malaysian fuel price debate)

me, you and everybody else tuned in last night to watch a high profile political debate between PKR advisor Anwar and Information Minister Shabery.

okay i didn't tune in but i watched it on youtube whilst the dude was uploading it one by one at 3 or so AM. lalz.

it was fun.

anwar previously in his speeches had asked for the PM or the DPM or both. there are two reasons for this, one, they would be worse contests than shabery, two, anwar wants to totally and severely embarrass the government, and this was the best way. cunning? for sho', he's a politician you know how they roll. however he didn't get his wish granted.

instead he got shabery who is a g00t speaker, it's just that his content was typical umno propaganda. i was expecting anwar to play the 'personal attack' too since that was all shabery could resort to and that's what oppositions like to do (kutuk kerajaan) but he calmly avoided wasting his time dwelling on it. instead (like the 'semangat 46' part) he would just calmly respond with slight but fatal swipes then continue with the more relevant content which effectively made shabery look like a fool.

i don't even know if anwar made sense with his explanation of how to increase subsidy. and i can't blame shabery for not being able to keep up with anwar (and constantly getting the flaw of his so-called facts pointed out by anwar), he's only a minister of information. but from someone watching this as just a debate, shabery was out of order, no matter how well spoken he was.

was there any need for irrelevant personal attacks and umno propagandas (who really gives a fuck who anwar was in the past whatever it was). those took nearly more than half of his speech. he didn't even answer most of the questions. while anwar did explain about why only 50 cents which to me was the main question that was even repeated two times by shabery. to me the opposition promised to lower fuel prices, they didn't say what the lowered price was (this is my imitation of how girls like to manipulate the truth lalz, i'm not even sure if the opposition ever did specify a price, fuck i know fuck i care), the government promised NOT to raise prices, a promise fundamentally broken without a doubt just a coupla months after the election (and we're still voting for them because?). i didn't think shabery was even bothered with any form of questions like the one from the guy whose questions you were supposed to answer in one whole round.

instead, what we acquired from him was more knowledge about what anwar did in '74 (i wonder if he listened to led zeppelin back in the days, enlighten us in the next debate plz mr. shabery?) , something something imf, something something who gives a fuck.

haha what a funny. it was disgusting, but at least shabery can really speak unlike that dude who caused the unplanned assassination of the malaysian people's image (so we're broken englished thugs now?). i'd say nice try by shabery, i don't even blame you for your content cause i'm pretty sure you're being forced to do it, i'm pretty sure you're an intelligent man, insaflah and you can join my upcoming new political party as one of our speakers (we'll provide the speech). PENYANGAK PARTY or was it PELANCHAU PARTY? can't really remember, both AWESOME-O names nonetheless.

and uh here's the twist (or not), i don't really agree that much with anwar's obsession towards increasing fuel subsidy anyway. okay maybe we could decrease the prices a little bit in line with the fact that we're exporters, maybe about 50 cents as suggested by anwar for an early step is enough, but no more than that (as anwar has promised), to me that's going a little too extreme considering oil is not a permanent asset and this is not a solution that i think is viable in the long run (although what the fuck would i know, the dude was our finance minister).

we should consider focusing more on expanding the alternatives. like whatever and whatever and whatever. like nik aziz said. i mean not all of us want to speed on the highways, some of us just want to get from point a to point b and then point c to point c and then an option of either point d, e, or back to point a or b, or just driving around and around point c, you know?

our salaries are not really high, the government don't seem to understand this. they need to figure out a balance between the country's financial state, the people's spending power, and the prices of shit. aight? it's as simple as that. we're not gonna go against them because of oil or other petty shit, it's because of their management of this country. we all know they corrupt as fuck, this is not a rumour, this is a fucking rule, if you dealing with the government one of the things you have to deal with is 'paham-paham jelah' or 'biasa ah tuh' (i don't know how to translate this phrase, help english maestros, pourpres?). it's not a speculation, it's tradition.

can i has sum change plz?

don't matter who. and don't worry peoples, parti penyangak (or pelanchau) is coming soon to a 7E near you. yeah bitches we operate 24/7 and we taking over this country with public enemy music (and a bit of wu tang here and there, maybe in debates, like they would say but why this and that and we cut 'em off and be like stfu PARTY PENYANGAK (OR PELANCHAU) AIN'T NUTHIN' TAH FUCK WIT! KONICHIWA BITCHES). muthafuckah.

(start watching the debates here)

this is how we do, how we get down

jangan setia kat parti, setia kat negara. jangan setia kat negara, setia kat benua. jangan setia kat benua, setia kat dunia. jangan setia kat dunia, setia kat tuhan. jangan setia kat tuhan? selalu selalulah jemur diri untuk sediakan diri. itupun kalau kau percaya lah, kalau kau tak percaya aku tak nak paksa kau percaya. apa gunanya kita berdebat kalau hakim kita tunggu kat alam sana. apa gunanya kita berdebat kalau kau bukan perempuan dan takkan ada make up sex lepas tuh. kalau kau perempuan pun apa gunanya berdebat kalau takde pent up sexual tension yang akan dilepaskan pas tuh. apa guna berdebat kalau akan habis dengan pertumpahan darah. apa guna tumpah darah kalau takde siapa yang tadah. apa guna tadah darah kalau takde siapa yang minum. apa gunanya minum kalau kau dahaga gi pas tuh. apa gunanya kau dahaga kalau kau tak minum. apa gunanya kau tak minum kalau kau dahaga.

apa guna buat jus buah kalau kau tambah gula jugak.

apa guna rempit kalau tak ada torchlight dengan parking space untuk di lelong. apa guna minah rempit kalau tak tonggeng. jangan jadi awek kalau kau tak dapat handle pussy. kau ingat pussy tuh senang nak handle, kau ingat kau tengok cerita blue kau dah cukup expert? pussy nih macam chemical engineering, ada ke chemical engineer graduate dengan tengok chemicals jolok chemical lain? tak mungkin. kalau ada aku tak berminat sebab aku prefer manusia. apa guna manusia kalau takde perasaan. kalau kau takde perasaan taraf kau lagi bawah pada binatang? kenapa? sebab binatang lagi bagus pada kau, tapi sebab kau ada perasaan yang binatang pun takleh handle, kau jadi atas sikit. apa gunanya sujud kat adam kalau takde janji yang kau takkan kena campak kat jahanam kalau kau sujud.

heritage row bukan tempat untuk enjoy, ianya tempat untuk beratur. semua orang takkan dapat lupakan alam sekolah. semua orang takkan dapat lupakan perhimpunan hari isnin. semua orang takkan dapat lupakan beratur. semua orang benci beratur. tapi semua orang belajar tinggi-tinggi, kerja gaji tinggi, semata-mata untuk beratur balek. kat club, kat pos office, kat red light district masa peak hour, kat yong tau foo uptown. hek eleh, kat pos office mana beratur, amek nombor lah. semua orang nak amek nombor. semua perempuan boleh di hakimi 1-10. semua lelaki cakap respek perempuan, tapi semua lelaki akan bagi 1-10 ratings untuk perempuan. semua lelaki akan amek nombor. semua lelaki kalau boleh nak nombor 7.5 ke atas. tak semua lelaki nasib baik. yang nasib baik amek nombor lain. nombor ekor lah buduh.

aku rasa cendol tuh macam syurga. tapi bukan setiap hari buleh minum cendol. tapi kat syurga setiap hari boleh. setiap saat pun buleh. masa sekolah cikgu cakap kat syurga leh mintak burger sekelip mata dapat. pastuh kau buat apa dengan burger tuh? kau makan lah.

aku nak mandi dalam sungai susu. and aku nak berenang sampai aku jumpa buah dada.

i'll never say goodbye, never never could, you know i never would

reading too much into things. paranoid. bells are ringing but bells are not ringing cause nobody rung the bell, i know this because i went down and opened the door when i thought the bells were ringing. the bells are ringing again. is that the phone ringing, no it's not because i have no phone. what's that noise? oh yeah, it's called the night. what's that ringing again? that's your head tilt it a little bit the paranoia might heal, are there any pills for this and no i'm not high. anybody want me to buy them on facebook? say so, drop your facebook here. not hungry but i feel like eating, not horny but i feel like wanking, need to piss but i'm holding it in. can't hold it anymore so i go piss now brb. i'm back. play cod4 and piss people off, sometimes i get pissed as well, i shouldn't, but i'm just not matured enough to realize this. is that the bells? no it's not. am i gonna wake up in the middle of pitch blackness sweating looking at the ufo through the windows, again. am i going to have a good drive in an empty neighbourhood while aliens are on their way here to wage war. wage war against humans or certain humans? cause i will be on their side against certain humans. sodomy is the talk of the town, the whole town is talking about sodomy, but sodomy is still a lonely being. you can have both legal and illegal powers in here if you join the right political party. there will be no revolution without the help of alien forces, preferably ones that look like us so we could laugh at the idiots who thought aliens looked like.. aliens.

mad props

a considerably large amount of props iz due to the dude who received a blowjob in his car in the middle of a fucking jam in bukit fucking bintang.

how the fuck did you achieve that. mad fucking props.

and the rempits are back too.

don't push me cause i'm close to the edge, i'm trying not to lose my head

i'm sorry if anyone did read this fiasco, i kinda read it and thought it was super lame, other than the main character's name being fuck of course. but sorry. deleted this bitch. sorry again.

don't ever fucking question that

you make me feel oblivious to everything around me. you are the only one who could hurt me, and you always try not to. i am so sensitive, i am touchy, anything people say can affect me no matter how small, a breeze of wind could hurt like hell if you're skinless, let alone fire ants. but no more. maybe you are pampering me, you distrupt the creation of my own defence mechanism. but i am tired of being independent. i want to be a parasite, i want to be that little sparrow standing straight on an eagle, you are the eagle soaring through the sky looking for a rat to snatch. i can be your eagle too sometimes, we will be each other's eagles. we take turn to be sparrows. you are my guardian angel, you will rain fire and brimstone over assholes who try to hurt me, you will shoot lightning at assholes who disgust me. you are my george w. bush, you will make everything disappear, you will conquer anything that needs conquering. that did not sound right but let me continue. you are my cleopatra, you mesmerize me, it doesn't matter that you don't even give a fuck about me. words can hurt me, but not when you're around, only yours could, and you always try not to. when i put my dick in your pussy you will squeeze it like it was diamonds that i'm trying to take away although it's actually my dick that belongs to me, but you can have it for a quarter of a second, before i take it back, then give it back to you, and so forth, you like it when i'm teasing. because when i tease, you get all wet, and you feel embarrassed because you don't want to cause flashfloods, you care for other people's welfare. if you start a flashflood in our room with your vaginal discharge, we will drown together, out of breath, we will look at each other panicking. and then i will open the door, and introduce your vaginal fluids to the world. only to suck it all back cause they can't have that shit, it's all mine. when you see the doctor, i won't let him touch your breasts, for it is all mine. to have something that has free will, but i can claim as all mine, all mine.. all mine! is the most beautiful feeling in the world. unfortunately, you don't exist, fuck you, why can't you exist? exist now! you don't exist, so here i am lying down in this bed, feeling like shit, looking at the ceiling, wishing i could just submerge into the ocean and start fondling the cock of a blue whale. ARGKH i suck.

action!

i don't have a split personality. none at all. it's just me.

but let's just assume that i might, could, or do, maybe.

i was driving just now and i went "yaw, what should i eat" to a possible another me. of course there is no another me, so another voice went "yaw, who the fuck are you talking to yaw?".

and then i paused. and i was like, if i didn't have another me why would there be another me scolding me for talking to another me because there's no another me.

i stopped the car.

i went outside.

i ran into the woods.

deep into the woods.

i ran up the mountains, towards the highest tree.

what happened to my car?

it's still moving. and i'm driving.

waukhghekagueaugakuhgeagukeakugeahhkuga wtf.

anyway,