Huhuhu

So. Apa pendapat korang kalau kita mimpi tengah tunggu orang, pastu bosan sangat tunggu (kat meja makan apa entah), terus letak kepala kat bawah pastu tidur? Apa ah pendapat korang? Apa ah?

Pastuhkan, aku main CM tau, main CM (Championship manager), pastu aku ada sorang player muda nih, power gak ah, nak tahu nama dia apa? Nama dia Peter Whitehead, wahkrhkaghkaghkahkgahka. Kelakar tak? Kelakar kan? Whitehead! Warhkahkgahkghkaghkahka, wahkrahkhkga, wahkrahkga, Kelakar kan? Warhkahkghkkhaa, faham ke tak? Faham kan? Tak faham? Kalau tak faham kau bodoh. Whitehead, wahkrahkghkaghkahka. Apa lah malang nama surname Whitehead. Warhkhakhkga.

Anywayyyyyyyy. Memang dah lama dari dulu, all guys seem to think that sayang aku senang nak dapat just cause aku dapat. All these fuckers ingat diaorang hensem sangat ke. Aku lagi hensem lah bodoh. Bahlol, bongong, bongak, semua ada. Pandang rendah sangat kat aku. Macam bagus je. Sayang aku, sayang aku lah. Fuck off. Peace..

Pahal Lu?

Boring dol. Hari tuh aku tengok malibu's most wanted, bodoh gila doh cerita nih, boring gila, tah pape entah, bodoh punya cerita, I give it a rating of M, for moron, whkarhkahkghkga. Anyway, hmmm apa patut ku tulis di sini, huhuhu, hmm ehem ehem. B for bosan. Huhuhu. Anyway aku sebenarnya dah bersama sayang aku kembali, lama dah pon. Anyway, apa lagi aku nak cerita kat sini, aku malas gila nak pergi kelas pukul 5 tahu tak?! Baik tidur kan? Tapi tuh tak betul gak, pasal "Baik tidur" applies to almost every single thing that requires thinking and boring the fuck out of yourself which is most synonimous with education. Whatever. Whatever. Whatever. Warhkaghkahkgahkghkaa, get it? W W W pastu W lagi? Get it? No? Fuck you then. Peace..

MAHAGURU

Imagine this there's this guy, having a conversation with a chick, in a mamak. He is backing a big screen projector showing a tight match (not facing it lah kan, facing the chick), he is focusing on the chick, talking with her, and his eyes never stray from her eyes (yes my fellow friends, not even a glance towards her boobies), who would he be? Yeah, he's THE MAN! The Mahaguru! He talked with the girl for hours and we (me and my friends) kept examining him, he's perfect, he even has the same drink for hours while we have had like 3-4 glasses, his level of focus and concentration on the chick and their conversation is perfect! Hail Mahaguru! Peace..

Apalah Sangat

Ahhhhhhh, nyampah ah! Asal orang cina banyak sangat alasan! Bencinyaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Belah lah, orang cina memang banyak alasan, everytime aku cakap "mana ang pow", mula lah "saya belum kahwin lagi lah" bla bla bla, yeah, guess what? I'm not married too!!!!! In your face sucka!!

Anyway. Saje je nak intro untuk :-

GONG XI FA CAI!!!!!

Mercun Ye Bang?

Aku tengah berak kan, sekali macam bau asap mercun kan, so macam tulah, macam bau asap mercun, kan raya cina kan?! Mestilah banyak mercun, tension lak bau asap, sekali aku teringat lak takde letupan pun, lerrrrrrrr rupa-rupanya bau taik aku, aku berak keras, kan kalau berak keras bau dia macam hangus sikit. Huhuhu. Peace..

Boringnya abang penyangak hari nih. Kerja projek tak nak buat, aku tak tahu lah apa nak jadi dengan aku nih, takde future ke. Syudehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Takde cerita nak cerita lah weyyyyyyyyy walaweyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Apa aku nak cerita nih? Bila Cik Edah nak buat lawak lagi. Huhuhu.

Cik Edah ooooooo Cik Edah bila nak buat lawak lagi? Huhuhu.

Jom kita layan Remy Shand - Rocksteady.

Rocksteady can't wreck myyyy worlddddddd apa entah bla bla bla oh how I how I often tryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Anyway, hmm, serious aku takde idea doh nak tulis apa kat sini. Hmm.

Ohh dulu masa sekolah ada budak nih nama dia Alex, aku suka ejek dia jalan mengonek, wahkrhkahkga, pasal dia jalan mengonek, kira dia macam terkangkang pastu konek macam kedepan, senang cerita mengonek lah, pastu kat poket belakang ada macam radio keluar antenna, apa entah pastu ada sikat apa ntah. Wahrkakghkahkga, macam kimak doh..

Okay check this. Ex-gf aku bengang dengan ex-bf dia (lelaki yang jadi bf dia lepas clash dengan aku), pasal to her, the guy played her (Fuck I know what really happened), then the guy mula nak baik dengan aku (ex-gf aku cakap cause maybe dia nak korek rahsia kami berdua dulu), the guy is a friend to my friend anyway, and aku bukan jenis nak musuh-musuh, and anyway, aku tak pernah judge the guy, cause to me, he might be innocent, he once explained the shit to me, and I understand, so what lah kan, he's an okay guy, so dia mula nak baik dengan aku, then ex-gf was like, kalau you kawan dengan dia, you have to forget about me, I mean, yeah either him or her lah. I was like, fuck I never had an enemy and I'm not about to start making 'em, so fuck it, aku pun dah tak kesah sangat, it's not like she gives a fuck about me or how much I love her. Fuck it..

Anyway, dengar pasal the rape thingy, mulalah kecoh kat t.v semua (If I hear about a news believe me it's big cause I never gave a fuck about the world). This is typical Malaysia lah, dah terhantuk baru nak terngadah. Forget about it, you can't do shit about it, God gave you RULES for your country, you went for a fucked up human version of rules with the majority based on westernized bullshit, this is what you get. I'm not saying anything, but that's it right, cause a wiseman once said, kalau kita buat benda bukan ikut cara Tuhan tetapkan, jangan harap lah He's gonna help us. If we do it his way, no matter how doubtful or hard it is, fact is, He's gonna help us. Anyway, so at TV3 people were calling right to give pendapat, and the majority started suggesting things like hukuman ikut Al-Quran semua kan, and the hosts were such idiots, don't you realize TV3 is supposed to be a government ass-kissing station, hahaha, and people were calling in, allthough they sound harmless, peep the content idiots, it had "Hudud" spelled all over it.

People will never realize that only God knows what's good for us. Fuck the feeble human mind. Everything laid upon us by God has a reason. Okay I'm gonna stop being a hypocrite now, hahaha, cause swearing is a sin. Hahaha. Peace..

Mint Shit

Kat rumah nih kat toilet bowl kannnn, my Momma letak this pewangi thingy and it's minty, so macam masa aku berak kan dia punya aura masuk dalam asshole tauuuu, so asshole aku macam berangin, sedapnyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, and then lepas berak kan, aku amik tahi aku, aku makan, uhhhh, macam chewing gum. Sure kentut aku wangi lepas nih, so beranginnnnnnnnnnnnn..